R.I.P. SAM

Dear Sam,

It is a shame I had not heard of you until after your passing, but if my words can in any way ease your transition from this world to the next, please know that you put a smile on my face, a chuckle in my heart, and you will forever be........ the ugliest damn dog in the entire world. Rest well, Buddy.

Scott

Drinking in the Park

Drinking in the Park on a November night in Tokyo. Although this city is revered for its cutting-edge style and elitist indulgences, never underestimate the sublime satisfaction of hunkering down with a tall boy of Green Apple Chu-Hi and pretending to be homeless for a few hours. BTW, thanks to the Tall Boy Ciffy for a much needed escape.


S

Workin on the Shink

This is how we get things done in Japan. Thanks to ""L$&%$ for the pic.

S

Week 13

We weren't scheduled for a trip to the Doctor this week, but the 5 bags of lime green bile purged from K's tummy forced us to go early. Luckily, Kotomi is feeling a bit better now (I think it was that curry I demanded we eat), and all of the important tests done at the end of the first trimester show we are in good shape for the challenges ahead. Baby P is a GIGANTIC 67 millimeters and growing rapidly, Mom is sick of being sick, and Dad is just trying to keep the apartment tidy.

On a different topic, Kotomi and I are faced with the decision of Kotomi's immigration next year. The ridiculously LARGE (100+ pages) application form is rife with hoops and hurdles of the severest inconvenience, even for those living in Tokyo. I don't know how I will get everything done living in Aomori.

OR, we could leave everything to a respected Canadian lawyer and his firm in Vancouver. All they would need from us is the various information and official papers (which would be translated from Japanese into the required English BY THEM). They can get cracking right away and are fairly confident that they can have everything done in time for an AUGUST homecoming.

But... There is the price tag, and a hefty one at that. I won't say how much, but let's just say that the 45 inch Plasma TV purchase will have to wait.

So here it is, a large weight off our shoulders at a large price. At least if we do it this way, we can be fairly confident there won't be any extra charges. If I do it myself, who knows how many times I'll need to buy a round-trip ticket to Tokyo for the honor of one official's signature at the Canadian Embassy.

Advice, anyone?



Scott, Kotomi and Baby

Hanging in there

I was going to publish a picture of Kotomi churling in the park. Everything considered, the photograph was a perfect balance of her inner gloom and turmoil reflected against a rainy, grey, soggy setting. After thinking about it, I decided to show you that my wife really is giving it her best during this crummy time. She can even manage a smile in between purgings. Ganbatte, Sweetie!!!

The Name Game

After several logic-based campaigns of reason, and numerous emotion-laced sorties of persuasion, it would appear that the Naming dispute is near an end. Kotomi and I have agreed on several names for the Baby... ALL of which will be kept a secret until the big day arrives. The only thing we can tell you is this: A girl will have a Japanese First Name and English Middle Name. A boy will have an English First Name and a Japanese Middle Name. Mums and Dads-to-be, we found this site to be a refreshing alternative to paying 10 bucks for a book of baby names (can you believe I actually saw a book in the shop entitled 10,000 Names You SHOULDN'T Call Your Child ?) Anyhoo, the site is www.behindthename.com . There is even a 100 Names Ranking for B.C. as late as 2004.

Baby Pike

The hounding paparazzi snooping daily through our trash has gotten to be too much for us, so K and I decided to go public with the VERY FIRST picture of BABY PIKE. This was taken yesterday at K's most recent trip to the Doctor. Everything still looks pretty routine, and as a proud Papa-to-be, I must say that is one FINE little LEG!!! We just need another one now, and the foundation to my PERFECT SUMO WRESTLER will be complete.

Scott and Kotomi

Welcome to my world...

To give you some idea of what it is like to work in a Japanese elementary school, imagine that after a busy morning you are settling down to lunch with a classful of bright, energetic 11 year olds. Half way through lunch, the cute little kid besides you finally works up the courage to try out some English he has been dying to use. "Do... do...... do you like HARD GAY?"

You wait for your eyes to stop watering from all that miso soup you accidentally snorted into your sinus cavities, and politely say "Pardon me?"

"You know HARD GAY? You like HARD GAY?!! WHOOOOOO!!!!!!" Of course this would mean nothing unless the student starts to violently jerk his pelvis back and forth. He does, and you take another gallon of miso up the wrong pipe. Naturally every student in a ten desk radius is listening, giggling, and eventually imitating their bold trailblazer, so in a matter of seconds, there are easily 2 dozen students grinding each other and screaming "You like HARD GAY?"

Hopefully this link will clear things up for you. http://mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp/waiwai/face/archive/news/2005/20050720p2g00m0dm024000c.html

If any of you are thinking about teaching in Japanese schools, please, for the sake of your sanity, do a little homework first and watch some Japanese TV.

The hardest videogame EVER?

Ok, since my carefree days of sitting in front of my TV - playing hours of video games while eating a baloney sandwich off my naked stomach-turn-TV tray - are almost over, I decided to treat myself for my 30th Birthday and buy myself a Nintendo Micro.

I had my eyes on a Sony PSP for the longest time, but in the end it was my wife's love for the classic games that won me over to Mario's side. Can I just say now that I completely forgot how BLOODY HARD old-school Nintendo games were?! What's going on?? I bought the original ancestor to the flying / shooting genre, Twin Bee, and I can't pass the first level 9 times out of 10!! It's like this sick, computerized DEMON of a program relishes in letting my missiles pass right through my enemies, while at the same time locking onto my slowly moving position for a kill shot from all the way across the screen. And those bells...... THOSE DAMN BELLS!!!! As far as I am concerned, I don't need a Playstation 3 or Xbox 360. I am gonna be busy with the Micro for a while.

P.S. Ghosts and Goblins and Dig Dug are quitely sitting on my Christmas wish list.... wink wink.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

Hi Gang! Everybody have a good Halloween? I know I said I would be henceforth devoting my blog to Everything Baby, but I had to just slip in a few Halloween greetings first.

Halloween in Saitama was creeeepy this year. There was a weak, chill wind blowing in from the north as the horizon silently turned from pink to purple to black. There were no children Trick or Treating on our street this year, but if I was a kid, and I heard the terrible sounds coming from our apartment, I wouldn't go near our building to save my life.

The sounds that were coming from my wife.... my god. Demonic Possession would have been the easy answer, but the noises she was making as she emptied the contents of her stomach into a flimsy plastic bag were something different. It sounded like... like... like she was screaming underwater. I have heard and done enough puking in my day to develop a thick hide to this natural act, but my wife was GURGLING for GOD's SAKE! She would pant heavily into her bag for a few seconds before sharply arching her back and spewing air, water, and apple. It was as if whatever beast was trying to squeeze its way out of her mouth was also trying to folder her in half like a napkin. I tried my best to soothe and comfort her, but my touch only made her want to chuff more. All I could do was watch as the invisible baby-making forces had their way with my wife. Finally, just as her eyeballs were about to pop from all the heaving, Kotomi abruptly stopped and collapsed on the futon. I got her some water, wiped her face, and we sat there in the dark, silently praying that whatever was raging inside her had finally found its way out. Somehow, I don't think it has...

Spooky, eh? As harsh as it sounds, Kotomi is really hanging in there like a champ. In honor of my Queen of Morning Sickness, I found this little quiz on the net. Take it when you have the time and see how you do! http://www.filmwise.com/visual/puke_01.shtml


Scott and Kotomi